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January 20, 2004
logjam
okay so my long absence from entries has created a log jam in my mind, so much has happened over the last few weeks...christmas parties, celebrations, visits and photos with family, new years, excessive consumption, unbelievable workload, travel to vegas, spectacular lapses in judgement and complete lack of sleep...i could go on and on...but it's just too overwhelming to try.
so i'll just recant my most recent lapse in judgement, mostly because the others [as usual] are not fit for print.
so i'm in the garage, digging out the christmas decoration boxes having finally decided to pack away my fabulous, if a little excessive, christmas lights and my precious charlie brown tree. i crane my neck and spy the ones i need at the top of the "box stack", towering 10 feet above my head. so i decide to scale the inevitable jumble that lives in every garage (isn't there? if you don't have a garage jumble, then give me a ring, you're hired) in front of the stack of boxes. with my right foot on the back of my grandmother's old puke-green wingchair that i refuse to get rid of, and my left on top of the dresser that holds all my childhood clothing, i reach way up to pull down the boxes. as i pull backward on the second box [you can see where this is headed can't you?] i stupidly try to do some sort of jerky pull so i don't bring the box lid down. because, you know it's far more important to _not_ lose the box lid.
at the second jerky pull [heh. no pun intended], i lose my balance, drop the box, do the slow cartoon-esque clockwise motion of my hands... "whoa...oh...no...fuck!", i reach back and grab the edge of the open door behind me, which promptly swings shut bringing me and the jumble down hard with excellent commotion on the concrete, cushioned only by my fortunately [for once in my life] ample behind. i also managed to jam the front fender of my bright-yellow low-rider bicycle into the lower left of my back. *oof* so now i have a knot bruise the size of texas in the middle of my back and my left ass feels permanently clenched.
i swear to god, i need supervision.
sigh.
Posted by heidijanet at January 20, 2004 02:43 PM
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Comments
my dad hasn't gotten the hang of comments yet, so i'm posting on his behalf (just so no one suspects my poor judgement is hereditary):
The first rule is:
1- anything over five feet from the ground "GET A GOD DAMNDED LADDER"!
Love
DADDYO
what i want to know is what the second rule is...?
Posted by: my dad at January 21, 2004 10:08 PM
Hey there!
I just stumbled onto your site through a link from Ariel's. I read your whole accident/er/surgery/hospital story, and then some of your more recent blog entries. You're a brilliant writer and I'm happy I found you!
Hope your bruises have healed.
Brandi
(if it's any consolation, I can picture myself doing the same thing...)
Maybe you better ask your Dad about the 2nd rule... (and post it, for our benefit!!!) ;-)
Posted by: brandi at January 23, 2004 09:30 AM
oh how sweet, thank you. and yes the bruises are fading nicely, thanks for asking.
and i DID ask him, but he's been strangely silent on the second rule...i'll keep you posted.
heidi
Posted by: heidijanet at January 23, 2004 09:36 AM
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