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February 25, 2005
that thing you're going though
ok, i've gotten so many sweet notes and get well wishes from people i love.
but i have to say this is best get well message. EVER.
thank you ariel, for causing me to re-injure myself by collapsing in a heap of laughter.
Posted by heidijanet at 06:44 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
source of all the commotion
so there it is, the infamous wedge compression fracture of the anterior superior of my L-3 vertebrae. seems to be pretty insignificant considering all the attention it's getting (and frankly the trouble it's giving me).
wedge compression fracture of the anterior superior of my L-3
Originally uploaded by in retrospect.
i made it to the orthopedist this morning, to make sure i get the right treatment, a hall pass to return to work and heal up properly.
my physician, Dr. Fish, confirmed i was real lucky, it's on the inside of the spine and it's a stable fracture so in six weeks or so i'll be all healed up and good as new.
having covered the important stuff, i staged a small protest to the radiologist notes that my pelvis was "unremarkable". i feel that was extraordinarily poor phrasing on their part. so filling out the new patient form i retaliated by checking "eats too little/too much" and "unhappy" under the "mental state" category.
subsequently, he wrote me prescriptions for more painkillers than one person of my size and disposition should really have access to.
so i'm sure my message got across loud and clear.
Posted by heidijanet at 02:03 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 21, 2005
that makes it seven.
i like to think of myself as an adventerous girl who's always game for a little excitement. while in mexico i jumped at the opportunity to get in the ring in flip-flops and a cape for a "faux-bullfight" (which turned out not to be faux at all), bungee jumped in cowboy boots for $20 and a t-shirt, i've raced (small) sailboats in rough water practically drowning us all, torn down mogul runs with the U.S. Ski team that should have ripped me in two, and i've white water rafted with ill-equipped companions and nothing but luck and life vests on my side.
and this last weekend, i've demonstrated yet again that some force in the universe is keeping me in one piece for some unknown future reason.
it all started with a road trip to palm springs with a couple of my favorite women to spend a few days in the sun, by the pool at the house of a friend from san francisco. he has a lovely place in indio with a pool, hot tub and generous helpings of good people and hospitality. he was participating in a polo tournament on sunday, so we were real excited about that.
unfortunately it rained most of the time we were there, so we spent our first evening drinking unnamed concotions of vodka, redbull, juice, tonic, subjecting us to totally inappropriate behavior by complete strangers involving hot tubs and high-velocity bananas. as the weather broke the next day, bill offered to take us for a nice leisurely ride on a few of his polo ponies. which sounded like an excellent idea. at the time.
i have a little experience growing up riding trail horses, as does my friend daniela. so we take off and fairly quickly realize the horses are pretty sensitive and are not all that excited about plodding along in the mud with a bunch of amateurs on their backs. after a few trots and inefficient turns, my horse made it stompingly clear that she didn't have whole hell of a lot of respect for me.
as we head back to the stables the horses started getting a little jumpy and excitable at the sound of a nearby polo ball being whacked, and the idea of getting back to the stable--and rid of us.
but things seemed to be going along just fine, when my horse suddenly bolted. before i realized what was happening it became clear that i'm clinging to a horse in a flat-out run headed toward thick brush and a rebar fence. i pulled in hard on the reins and screamed WHOA! nothing. i tried it again. still nothing. she just didn't care how hard i pulled. not one bit. as a matter of fact, i think it made her go a little faster. sort of a horsey fuck you i expect.
so barely clinging to the back of this horse, desperately trying to get her to stop, but also somewhat terrified that she WILL stop and send me flying into god knows what, we reached the bushes, she planted and made a hard right around a corner into the maze of stables filled with fences and rebar and golf carts and people and all kinds of other frightening and apparently deadly obstacles. by now it has become clear that i cannot stop this horse, and no one can help me. i begin to think that i may well not make it through this. it's strange to have time to think about this. weighing your options for a few seconds seems like a real long time. at this point i'm not thinking about how to escape injury, but how to injure myself the least--in other words try not to kill myself.
clinging to the neck of the horse, with one foot in the stirrup and my heart pounding through my ribs, i leap off the horse as i'm passing a relatively clear spot as the horse is headed in a relatively straight line.
the hard landing on my ample ass audibly crunched the hell out of my back and sent me rolling into a neaby fence cracking my head in two places. however i can't quite figure out the physics on that one.
lying quietly in the mud, i look up to see the hoofs pass by my face, i hear people running to over to me making all kinds of noise. while lying very still on my back, i realize that i'm only moderately injured, my arms and legs move just fine. my head and neck are banged, but not injured. i grin widely and think, okay...well that's seven.
i'm starting to keep a running tally. those moments where i could have and in some cases should have simply not survived. at least the ones i know of.
at any rate, afer seven hours in the ER, which my fantastic friends turned into an event with wine, cheese, crackers and the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition it turns out i have a compression fracture of my L3 vertebrae.
please forgive my rambling valium and lorcet-induced story, these painkillers aren't all that conducive to clarity of thought. or judgement.
which clearly doesn't factor strongly into my nature as it is.
Posted by heidijanet at 09:09 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 18, 2005
complimentary harassment
walking to my car in santa monica, i passed a man sitting in a stoop. i smiled good evening to him and as i passed he suddenly erupted, "ah yeah, BUTTERFLY!"
this kind of made me smile.
Posted by heidijanet at 07:30 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 17, 2005
good fortune...in bed
i love it when i get a good fortune cookie fortune. today's:
"YOUR ENTHUSIASM INSPIRES PEOPLE"
which was fantastic.
until a friend said, "inspires people to do what?"
i furrowed my brow (for the second time this week) and replied, "uh...inspires people....in bed!"
Posted by heidijanet at 04:43 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 16, 2005
selectively optimistic
i've developed a crush. the kind of adolescent crush in which the other person likely doesn't have a clue. i first realized this yesterday. there's been a distinct furrow in my brow ever since.
then, a girlfriend of mine admitted she had developed a crush on someone. and i was tickled for her. weird that when your girlfriend admits a crush, your first reaction is "yay!" accompanied with a little jig of delight.
however, when i admit to myself that i have a crush on someone...my first reaction is "oh crap."
Posted by heidijanet at 01:19 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 14, 2005
get out, dress up, get down
in blue
Originally uploaded by in retrospect.
in the past i've complained about the counterintuitive reluctance to dress up and get out on the dance floor in la. migrating to the southland from san francisco, has left yours truly frustrated with the strange lack of great dance venues in this town that don't require your name on a list, an intimate relationship with the bouncer or a $500 table with bottle service.
but i'm starting to discover very cool gatherings like this one beautifully executed by the do lab downtown.
the only dissenting opinion i've received so far following my five hour dancing excursion in a furry hat is from my poor mistreated feet. sorry guys.
Posted by heidijanet at 12:06 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 12, 2005
verbal tangle
my niece just turned two and is rapidly developing her verbal skills. it's obvious that everytime she talks to you she's desperate to have a conversation.
the other day she got herself in trouble, and managed to successfully argue her case:
suz: "what did you do that for?!"
isabella: *pause to concentrate*
isabella: "five!"
oh and by the way, she's also learning to count.
Posted by heidijanet at 01:55 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 11, 2005
curb your enthusiam. please.
i dropped off my car today for service, and was given a rental for the day. as i was discussing my car options with the agent, she beamed widely as she offered me my choice of convertibles.
i turned to look out the window at the downpour outside, raised an eyebrow and replied in my familiar smirking sarcasm, "oh yes, excellent--a convertible! either one is fine."
i'm back in a suit today, which is my sad-ass excuse for deflating the poor woman's enthusiasm for her offer.
Posted by heidijanet at 09:16 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 10, 2005
praise IKEA
is this the aftermath of a bombing? a riot over the u.s occupation of iraq? a protest to raise awareness of the instability in uganda?
injured for the cause of IKEA
uploaded by in retrospect.
no. this is the opening of the IKEA in london. one person was stabbed, several were injured in the almighty pursuit of a cheap, yet fashionable couch.
passion of the shopper
uploaded by in retrospect.
"A woman with pot plants said: "I've come from Birmingham for this." Jilal Patel, 29, from Tottenham, said: "I was queuing at 11am. Nothing is going to stop me from getting my sofa." [courtesy of this london]
Gud förbjude.
[courtesy of metafilter]
Posted by heidijanet at 11:37 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 09, 2005
skin deep
i'm wearing a suit today. black with silver pinstripes with a funky stiff collar and a knee-length skirt. my hair is smoothly tied back without of any of my characteristic unruly bedhead.
i'm mystified and slightly amused at how my outfit is affecting my demeanor today. i'm a little more stern, my gait is a wee more purposeful. i'm not joking around as much with co-workers and my expression seems to be stuck firmly between a bemused smirk and a condescending stare over the tops of my reading glasses.
i keep resisting the urge to carry a ruler for gentle knuckle-rapping of misbehaving co-workers.
all of this is amusing the hell out of me.
(and feels a little, dare i say, naughty)
Posted by heidijanet at 01:18 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 07, 2005
close...but no erm, cigar
well not quite a googlewhack, but apparently this site is the single solitary result for animated raindrop floaties.
huh.
Posted by heidijanet at 07:45 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
what day?
some conversations put a fine point on things unexpectedly:
me: like my new soft robe?
val: ooh!
me: it was on sale! everything in this town seems to be 75% off!
val: well, there's a very small window of time when men shop.
me: *perplexed look*
val: valentine's day?
me: oh, right.
me: *pause*
me: clearly that day has completely slipped off my radar.
Posted by heidijanet at 07:28 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
bloody monday
slept through alarm.
construction. twice.
my mini cupholder snapped off. while turning a corner. much needed coffee everywhere. unfortunate when you can smell your coffee but cannot partake.
schoolbus in malibu canyon.
more construction.
missed my first am meeting.
i sincerely hope this isn't going to define the rest of my week. the only good news so far is that maybe i can get this cupholder.
Posted by heidijanet at 10:52 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
February 02, 2005
singing a new song
i worked an eight-hour day today. with a full hour lunch.
and i am right now at this very moment sitting in front of my fireplace with an excellent glass of cabernet enjoying the silence.
tomorrow i think i'll do it again.
Posted by heidijanet at 09:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
glass houses
chatting with a friend today, about a new addition to his department who's a little quiet. however, he was speculating that because she had rings on her middle fingers, it suggested a dominant personality.
as i was about to jump in and add to that notion and get into what that might mean for him, i suddenly noticed the ring on my middle finger.
and quickly hushed myself.
Update: after meticulous research (read: googled) wearing a ring on your middle finger might actually suggest an identity crises. given this hypothesis, you'd think i was actually a pinky ring kind of girl.
Posted by heidijanet at 02:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack